The Party’s Over
The Party’s Over
Have you ever noticed that Facebook is often little more than a barrage of personal vendettas, gripe sessions and complaints? Don’t get me wrong—overall, there are a lot of positive things going on in social network central—everything from baby announcements to birthday greetings to weight loss to all manner of personal accomplishments and triumphs. On the other hand, there’s a lot of bad news, too. People launch indignant complaints and grievances like brooding teenagers at a sleepover. Facebook is crawling with passive aggressive banter that can make even the most liberal of us groan with aggravated distaste.
Here’s a paraphrase of one of my favorite Facebook grievances:
I’m really sick and tired of so-called friends. Yeah, you know who you are. I’m so over it. Moving on.
I have personally witnessed people on Facebook:
- Criticize their spouse
- Complain about their job
- Slam law enforcement and public officials and administrators
- Openly insult random people
- Post provocative and/or crude photos or links
- Make threatening or degrading statements to a person or group
- Announce they are not home, on vacation, or that their spouse is not home (not a big deal amongst friends, unless your privacy settings allow your status to post to anyone who is searching or looking).
Most of the time, I am pretty open-minded. Not much bothers me unless it is openly racist, pornographic or violent. But I have to say, I am puzzled. Why do people feel compelled to so willingly air their private information, thoughts and problems?
It’s interesting, to say the least. I mean, some of us are just more chatty or open with others. We are the ones who never met a stranger, who wouldn’t mind sitting down with someone we just met and telling them about our crazy childhood, or our obsession with bubble wrap, for example. We are social butterflies, flitting from one conversation to another, in hopes of squirming our way into them.
Then, there are those of us who are simply more private. We tend to keep to ourselves. We aren’t particularly social, but we have friends—often, we have more close, deep relationships with fewer people. We are guarded. It may take us months to tell a friend about a problem we have or a difficult experience we went through.
Some of us may fall in the middle. We are outgoing and social, yet prudent in how we communicate, and in what we choose to reveal about ourselves. We demand an understated respect from those around us.
I would classify myself amongst the second group. I’m a private person—to a degree. I’ve been told I’m hard to get to know, but then, once you get to know me, there’s a whole lot of deep stuff underneath the surface. Pretty much pegs my personality, I think. For those of us who fall into this group, Facebook can confound us. We sit back, eavesdropping on other people’s lives, wondering, what on earth people are thinking. The acronym TMI (Too Much Information) takes on new meaning.
I mean, do people think no one is paying attention? Are they firing off in hopes that the one person they’re mad at will suddenly, upon reading their post, have an “AHA!” moment and feel terrible for being such a jerk? Are these ramblings merely cries for help? Are they self-directed therapy of some sort? Are they momentary lapses of reason?
Oh boy, I am probably going to lose some friends over this one…
I don’t know about you, but sometimes, I just want to check out. Thankfully, Facebook gives me the option to do just that. Have you ever, for the preservation of your own sanity, selected a blanket removal from your news feed of all posts by a particular person? Have you ever just wanted to turn off the conversation?
I am going to show my age here, but when I was a kid, we had a party line. For those of you young ‘uns who don’t know that that is, it’s a shared telephone line amongst neighbors. In other words it’s like having about fifteen people in a house with one phone line and two telephones. If you had a hankering to, you could pick up the phone all hours of the day and actually hear your neighbors’ private conversations. As a kid, it could be wildly entertaining—hence the name, “Party”—until you got bored listening to some lady talk about her bunions and decided to hang up.
Somewhere, sometime way back, a smart individual decided that party lines were a bad idea. The whole modern day telecommunications industry was founded on the principle that everyone should have their own line because we don’t need to know each other’s business—for personal privacy, as well as safety reasons. What a concept!
Facebook is a little like a party line…except, I’m not eight years old, and I’m not back in my pink shag carpeted room with my Shawn Cassidy poster, muffling a giggle as the neighbors argue over dog poop on the phone. Somehow, it’s not so fun anymore. The party’s over. Sigh. Growing up sucks.


![MP900433180[1]](http://melissadereberry.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/mp90043318011.jpg?w=300&h=200)
![MP900386632[1]](http://melissadereberry.files.wordpress.com/2011/02/mp9003866321.jpg?w=214&h=300)
